


Can We Just Get a Pause? (To Be Certain, We'll Be Tall Again)

by sweeterthankarma



Category: Dare Me (TV 2019), Dare Me - Megan Abbott
Genre: 500 Words Challenge, Aged-Up Character(s), Complicated Relationships, Established Relationship, F/F, Light Angst, Making Up, Post-Canon, blink and you miss it reference to eating disorders, domestic!Addybeth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-13
Updated: 2021-01-13
Packaged: 2021-03-17 15:20:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28727238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweeterthankarma/pseuds/sweeterthankarma
Summary: “You know you’re the only one I want, right?”
Relationships: Beth Cassidy/Addy Hanlon
Comments: 17
Kudos: 28





	Can We Just Get a Pause? (To Be Certain, We'll Be Tall Again)

**Author's Note:**

> Title comes from the song "Evermore" by Taylor Swift and Bon Iver.

They’ve spent the whole day fighting. 

It’s nothing new, not really, but every muttered curse word still stings. The red wine that’s usually sipped at dinner is gulped, swallowed down between hesitant bites. Beth says the dinner is good. Addy mumbles a “thank you.” She didn’t cook much of it, just followed the instructions on the packaging and put it in the oven for a little over the time it said to. It’s not really cooking, not much of a skill. Not like keeping herself composed around Beth is.

Addy briefly considers driving to see RiRi. She’s a good two hours away in Cleveland, cramped in some co-ed dorm that she claims to like if only for the cute guy— or maybe  _ guys— _ across the hall that she’s been hooking up with. It’s so cliche. So nice, neat, perfectly fitting to her life and her needs and her desires. There’s no room for Addy there. 

Sometimes it feels like there’s no room here for her, either. All the same, on days like today, it can feel like there’s _ too  _ much room. And with all that empty space, she can get lost fast. Can find herself wading, almost drowning in the opportunities, searching for Beth at the end of it all. Like Beth is the only thing she knows, the only thing she’ll ever know. There’s nothing left to learn. She already knows the truth: Beth always saves her. 

She’s never failing, never faltering. Never late, not unless Addy wants her to be. Beth holds up her end of the deal every damn day, strong and sturdy and steady no matter how drenched Addy is or how long it took for her to see her in the dark. 

So Addy caves first, at least for tonight.

“You know you’re the only one I want, right?” 

She doesn’t turn to look at Beth when she says it, only flicks her gaze between the TV screen and the bowl of untouched popcorn resting between both their knees. Neither of them eat much, never really ever did. It’s only there for show, really, something like a prop, like a for either of them to grasp in moments like these. A railing to hold onto when their feet falter on the rungs, climbing a ladder to survey the messes they’ve made. There’s always some kind of mess. Never enough cleaning supplies in their new apartment to possibly put a dent in remedying the filth. 

“Beth?”

It’s not an apology. Doesn’t even cover what brought Beth to near tears before she’d even had her morning coffee. Doesn’t mention the things she’d said, words spit out only to be regretted with a cigarette hanging from her lips later on. They both know that. 

But still, Beth hums out an affirmative sound. It’s not much, but it’s all Addy’s going to get out of her right now. It’s all she ever seems to get out of her. 

And, somehow, it’s all she needs.

“Okay, good.” 

Somehow, it’s enough.

**Author's Note:**

> Come say hi and talk to me about Dare Me, or any other fandoms I'm in— or should be in!— at my Tumblr blog [here](https://sweeterthankarma.tumblr.com/) or at my Twitter account [here!](https://twitter.com/sweeterthnkarma)


End file.
